Teenage Dreams

I am the owner of a teenager.  This is not an easy job.  It is like riding a roller coaster without a safety belt.  Scary, thrilling and somewhat nauseating.  The teenager in question is a tall, lanky, moody child.  Teenage-dom did not create this.  He has always been tall, lanky and moody.  Even at birth.  But now he is this way on an even larger scale.  With the added bonus of testosterone.  Conversations with my child are like watching a tennis match on speed. At the end of the match, one has whip-lash from how quickly the tone changes.  One minute he wants to hug me and says "I love you mommy" and then next, he is stomping off somewhere yelling "I hate you.  You ruined my life".  All because he feels his immediate needs are not being met to his satisfaction.  He did this when he was two, only back then, I could put him in the time-out chair.  Time out at this age involves much more creativity.  To make it all more complicated, I am parenting essentially on my own.  My ex and I have not spoken in over a year, and before that, any communication from him was simply a dissertation on my faults and alleged poor parenting.  Anyway, as a single mom of a boy whose father is abusive, I am faced with many challenges.  I have no one standing behind me backing me up or insisting that he respect his mother and behave.  I have to insist.  I have to follow through.  I have to be both parents at once. 

My son has many good qualities.  He can be sweet.  He is smart.  He has beautiful eyes.  He has an amazing sense of humor.  He can snowboard with incredible grace.  But, he has my stubborness and my Italian temper.  He has his father's ability to lie, tease others cruelly and be amazingly lazy.  He has my lips and my freckles.  He has his father's height, high metabolism and lanky body.  He and  I both love comedies, especially anything that has Chevy Chase, Steve Martin or Bill Murray.  His father and him share a love of video games and sports.  Loving him is not easy, but it's not hard either.  Especially when he is sleeping. 

I am not sure how I am going to navigate these waters.  These are stormy times.  I can only hope that the testosterone storm winds down before the estrogen storm begins.  Because I also have a daughter who has less than 3 years to teenage-dom.  And her estrogen will be gearing up just as mine is winding down.  But that is a story for another day.